Ever since I started calling women together in what I now refer to as Sacred Sister (Moon) Circles, I’ve been fielding DMs and even phone calls from sisters about how they can do the same.
The irony is that I’m not exactly an authority on circling; I only started calling them because sisterhood and circling are sacred to me, and no one in my community – at least to my knowledge – was doing it.
Anyway, I’ve decided to create a resource that shares what I do and how I do it. My hope is that it will relieve any performance anxiety or trepidation you may hold about calling your own circle.
Calling a sacred circle
If you feel the nudge to call a sacred circle, please honor this nudge! I honestly believe from the depths of my heart that we will elevate the collective consciousness of humanity through sacred circling…and that it’s through this elevation that we’ll prevent humanity’s seemingly inevitable Armageddon and restore balance to Mama Earth.
Calling a circle is so simple that I dare you to pick a date right now where you can carve out 2-3 hours of uninterrupted time to host yours, plus a few hours for planning purposes in the days or week preceding your circle.
Now that you’ve picked a date and have set aside a little time to plan, you’ll need to identify your sacred circle’s purpose. My advice is to keep it simple, with a singular focus.
Once you’ve identified your purpose it’s time to put it out there to the world. Yes, I’m talking social media, unless you have another means of getting in front of your desired attendees. Here’s a link to one of my Instagram posts that I also shared to my personal Facebook account and three neighborhood Facebook groups. Note that it was a small neighborhood Facebook group that generated all of my first circle’s attendees.
This, my friends, is quite literally how you call a sacred circle.
The rest of this post focuses on considerations that I believe are important when planning and facilitating sacred circles.
Note that at the end of this post is a link to download a free guide that includes the exact format I follow when facilitating my monthly sacred sister full moon circles. In fact, the guide is a great complement to this post and will (hopefully!) leave you feeling confident and capable of calling your own sacred circles.
Elements of sacred circles
I’ve received training in various types of sacred circling through several entities and organizations because my soul craves this sort of thing, and I’ve come to realize that gathering women this way is my dharma! But you don’t need any professional training to call a sacred circle.
Though there is no right way to facilitate a circle, there are common elements woven into every sacred circle and training I’ve attended and facilitated.
For example, sacred circles:
- Are conducted in well-defined containers.
- Honor agreements and expectations.
- Involve holding space for each participant.
- Have a defined purpose and aren’t generally about conversing and socializing.
Let’s take a brief moment to examine each.
Well-defined containers
Sacred circles are conducted in well-defined containers. In other words, they have boundaries and structure, both of which are communicated to the participants.
A sacred circle is time-bound; it has a marked beginning and end. Saying “The circle is now open” invites in the sacred and “The circle is now closed” recognizes completion.
This ties into the next section: agreements and expectations.
Agreements and expectations
Sacred circles honor agreements and expectations. These agreements and expectations offer participants a roadmap for how to show up powerfully and conscientiously.
In the circles I call, we all take turns reading our sacred circling agreements, which are a list of statements about how we agree to conduct ourselves. For example, we address things like how to hold space, who gets to speak and when, how we balance safety and truth (e.g. navigating triggering moments), etc. After we’ve read our agreements, I ask if anyone would like to add any agreements. Note that we read our agreements each and every time, regardless of who shows up.
Please don’t gloss over this part! Without agreements, you’ll likely contend with cross-talk, a few personalities who dominate the circle, and a lack of safety felt by some participants. Without agreements, your circle is also little more than a social gathering.
Holding space
Sacred circles involve holding space for each participant.
When we hold space for others, we show up for them without agenda. We give them the gift of our full presence. We witness them, their souls. We respect them as they are, without trying to ‘fix’ anything, offering advice, or jumping on the “I can’t believe he did that…!” bandwagon. We’re simply there.
When we hold space for others, we show them that they matter.
Purpose
Sacred circles have a defined purpose and aren’t generally about conversing or socializing. I know this may sound odd, so please hear me out.
When we call a sacred circle, we do so with intention. What is our purpose?
As mentioned in the previous section, a critical element of sacred circles is the act of holding space. When we hold space, we aren’t giving feedback, advice, or even words. And when it’s our turn to share, we’re sharing about ourselves and our experience. There is no conversing involved.
Similarly, there is no socializing once the circle is opened and until it’s closed. In my sacred circles, sisters can socialize before we officially begin at 7:20 and after we’ve closed at 8:45.
Yes, some circles do involve conversing, e.g. those that aim to involve the community in addressing an issue. But while I’ve been a frequent participant in such circles, they aren’t what I’m addressing in this post.
Final Thoughts
Calling and then facilitating sacred circles isn’t complicated but does require thoughtfulness and intention.
If you want more, I’ve created a free guide that includes the exact format I follow for my sacred sister full moon circles and is a natural extension of this blog post. Click here to access it.
If you’d like to learn about circling opportunities, which will likely include trainings and workshops by mid-2023, sign up for my emails (if you download the guide, you’ll automatically receive them).
If you’d like to “pick my brain” or have a private mentoring session with me where we’ll explore your specific needs, click here to learn more. It would be an honor to work with you!
